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November 1 marks the end of spooky season. October: Over. Candy: eaten. Decorations: left up for a few days until your neighbors start to judge you. There's some of us, though, that like to keep the creepy vibe going all year round - and in 2020, hasn't every season been spooky? Whether you're just not ready to let go of the Halloween spirit or you're looking to distract yourself from the real-world horror outside your window, here are my top 7 favorite horror movies for an extra week of screams.  7. Halloween (1978) One of the OG slasher movies, John Carpenter's 1978 classic follows Michael Myers on his rampage through Haddonfield, IL on Halloween night. It establishes the rules of the genre: if you're a sex-crazed teen or the bitchy friend (or both - looking at you, Annie), you're going to catch a knife to the chest. While some of the cast could use a few acting lessons, even the cheesiest moments are still enjoyable, and it's worth catching Jamie Lee Curtis as one of the first Final Girls. Also, John Carpenter's score slaps.  6. Halloween (2018) I had to put these back to back. One of the best horror sequels out there, the film ignores the decades of questionable entries in the Halloween franchise, and we cut straight to Halloween in Haddonfield 40 years after Michael Myers committed the infamous "Babysitter Murders.” Michael is back and ready to finish what he started. Curtis's Laurie Strode is back too, a recluse bent on revenge. The movie still hits on the classic tropes through a modern lens while also grappling with the effects of trauma on three generations of Strode women. Not bad for a slasher sequel.  5. Hell House LLC (2015) Blair Witch may have popularized the found footage horror film, but Hell House LLC perfects it. In the frame narrative, a documentary crew is researching the mysterious deaths of 15 people at the 2009 opening of Hell House LLC's haunted attraction in Abaddon, New York. The bulk of the film is composed of first-person footage from the Hell House crew setting up their new haunt in the Abaddon Hotel. The suspense builds slowly as the crew - and the audience - catches glimpses of real-life horrors lurking amongst the props, growing to a fever pitch in the final act. One of the few movies to make me scream out loud.  4. The Conjuring (2013) James Wan is a modern master of horror, and The Conjuring launched one of the genre's current most successful franchises. While the quality of the sequels and related flicks is debatable - I personally enjoy them - The Conjuring is the best possession film since The Exorcist. Based on a true story from the lives of famous demonologists Ed and Lorraine Warren, the film follows the Perron family as they're terrorized by supernatural entities in their new home. The casting is perfect, and Wan makes you feel for the characters and their suffering. The jumpscares aren't bad either; I will never in my life play another game of hide and seek.  3. Get Out (2017) I hate when critics say a horror filmmaker has "reinvented" the genre, but Jordan Peele at least reanimated it with Get Out. Photographer Chris Washington is anxious about attending a family gathering with his girlfriend, Rose Armitage, uncomfortable being the only Black man in a sea of potentially hostile White faces. Strange encounters with the Armitages, their neighbors, and the few Black people in attendance confirm his fears, which only grow as the horrifying secrets of the Armitages' upstate New York community unravel. A cutting commentary on racism and faux-woke White liberalism, Get Out excels at building dread and serving scares.  2. The Thing (1982) John Carpenter earns a second spot on this list with 1982's The Thing. A group of American scientists at an Antarctic station take in a stray sled dog that has narrowly escaped being gunned down by a Norwegian helicopter. The helicopter crashes in a fiery explosion, and the Americans are unaware of the terror that they have invited into their base. Secluded at the edge of the world, they have no escape from the thing that begins taking over their bodies one by one. With truly awesome 1980s gross-out effects, the extraterrestrial "thing" is almost as scary as the backstabbing paranoia that overtakes the crew. Nothing is quite as scary as what humans will do to each other in times of crisis, a theme that feels all too real in 2020.  1. Alien (1979)
"In space no one can hear you scream." So reads the tag line for Ridley Scott's 1979 sci-fi/horror masterpiece (and my favorite horror movie). The crew of the commercial vessel Nostromo investigates a distress signal in deep space from a derelict alien ship. When one of the crew, Kane, is injured by a creature from a strange egg, senior officer Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) tries to keep him off the ship. Her crewmates ignore her, and the terror aboard the Nostromo begins. Blending the best of sci-fi and horror, Alien is a masterclass in how to make a creature feature. The production design is stunning, and the practical effects still hold up to modern viewing. I still find myself holding my breath when the titular alien goes on the hunt, ominously stealthy for its size. It's one of the only horror movies my mom has ever seen, and it scared her enough that she would like to keep it that way. So that's how I'll be spending my week. What about you? What are your favorite films that keep you up at night? Let me know in the comments below, and stay spooky!
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They say everybody has demons. I'm here to tell you about mine. Metaphorically speaking, I mean. Literal demons don't like it when you talk shit behind their back, so let's just focus on the metaphorical ones for now.
In an ongoing effort to open my third eye (and however many other extra eyes may be hiding about my person), I'm dusting off the old tarot deck and stretching my mind muscles with another amateur tarot reading.
I meant to do this Sunday at the full moon - especially since it was a super snow moon, which sounds like it's probably important - but the Oscars were on and I was too busy judging rich people's fashion choices while cramming my face full of gluten-free cookies. I have a solution, though; the full moon is meant to open your mind and offer a jolt of divine inspiration, right? Well, I have the perfect analog for that sort of mystical energy: knocking back several hard seltzers in quick succession. Brain sufficiently lubricated, let's see what these cards have to say about our future. If you’re sick of hearing about self-care and have already started internally bitching at the title of this article, I can’t say that I blame you. I’m admittedly skeptical of some tips (looking at you, jade vagina egg), but while it’s easy to grumble about new-age, snake-oil bullshit attempting to capitalize on a movement that millennials actually care about, there’s obviously a real need for self-care. If there wasn’t a demand out there, self-care wouldn’t have soared to a $10+ billion industry over the last decade.
I know that this might not seem like a topic well-suited to my blog, and you’re probably wondering what the fuck I, an anxiety-ridden mess of a human,* could possibly offer in the way of useful advice. Rest assured - I’m not here to tell you to take a bubble bath or wash your face more often. Relaxing and recharging is all well and good, but I’m more interested in the type of self-care that empowers, the kind that boosts your self-confidence and gives you the energy to conquer the world. What fell creature emerges now from the cold dark of deepest winter, frigid claws scraping across a dusty keyboard to deliver its sinister message? What eldritch abomination lumbers online, joints creaking from disuse, to scream into your brain through the void of cyberspace?
 This looks like a lovely, serene place for a walk, right? All lush and green and full of life?
It’s also full of dead people. This is a natural burial cemetery in Lawrence, KS. I drove about an hour to check it out after binge-watching Caitlin Doughty’s YouTube channel, Ask a Mortician, and learning all about what happens after we die. Well, what happens to our bodies, at least. Tarot Reading 8.26.19 I’ve decided I’m going to try to be a psychic.
Look, I know that it’s supposedly a “gift” or a “calling”: a talent that’s inherited more than learned. But who’s to say I don’t have a little bit of the shining, eh? I get deja vu sometimes. I get those gut feelings everybody talks about, and they seem to be pretty accurate about 70% of the time. Like, whenever I eat at Taco Bell, I can see with perfect clarity what will be happening in my bathroom in 2 hours. Latent psychic abilities, or the perils of mystery meat? Who’s to say. “Do you believe in ghosts?”
It’s a fun icebreaker question, and it’s one that I get asked a lot. I’m not surprised that people wonder; I’m an unapologetic - some might say rabid - fan of paranormal investigative shows. I’ve watched every episode of Ghost Adventures, Ghost Hunters, and Buzzfeed Unsolved, as well as some terrible, straight-to-Netflix shows I can’t remember the name of. You know the type: interviews with wack-a-doos that look like they were filmed in the 1980s and spooky re-enactments with real low production values. I can’t get enough of that stuff. The screech of a spirit box, the shrill of an EMF meter - those are my jam. So yeah, it sure seems like I should be somebody who believes in ghosts. An epitaph:
Here lies Sarah's enthusiasm for life. Estimated time of death: 10:54 a.m., Central Daylight Time, June 21, 2019. Can you feel those eyes on the back of your neck? The fine hairs standing up, goosebumps prickling under the weight of that gaze?
Relax. It's just me. I didn't meant to scare you. Everything's fine, just keep looking at your screen and allow me to introduce myself. |
AuthorSarah Fettke is an aspiring horror author from Kansas City, Missouri. This is a place to collect her explorations of the queer, peculiar, and strange. Archives
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